21 Helpful Tips For a 90 DAY PMO Reboot
Are you addicted to online pornography?
And as a consequence you are dealing with some, or all, of the following problems…
- Porn induced erectile dysfunction
- Low libido and lack of attraction to real people
- Concentration problems
- Delayed ejaculation
- Anhedonia (inability to feel pleasure in life)
- Morphing sexual tastes
- Low motivation and drive
- Social anxiety
…well, if so I have got both good and bad news for you.
The bad news is that you are going to have to do a 90 day PMO reboot.
The good news is that you just found one of the most helpful articles on the web, full of tips that will help you get through your 90 day PMO reboot…
What is a PMO Reboot?
PMO is an acronym for porn – masturbation – orgasm.
A “PMO reboot” simply means a period of time when the porn addict abstains from all artificial sexual stimulation (porn), masturbation, and orgasm in order for the brain to heal and become more sensitive to real life sex again…
…in other words, we want the brain sexual center to return to its natural state. The way it was before we started messing it up with all the high stimulating porn.
Why 90 Days?
It's not a magical number. Some people experience a lot of benefits long before the 90 day period is over, while others need a lot more time…
….but it is nice to have some kind of goal to aim for, and so the 90 day PMO reboot is what a lot of guys are shooting for when they set out on this journey.
What Are The Rules For Doing A PMO Reboot?
The rules are simple as there is only one main rule…
Now, your brains sexual center does not know what “porn” means, but YOU have to know that by using the word “porn” we mean anything artificial that you find sexually arousing.
So even though, for example, booty shaking videos by definition are not called porn, if you find them arousing, you need to stay away from them!
Pixels on a screen = NO!
Real life people = YES!
That's the one and only rule and if you just follow that one, all the negative consequences you gathered from years of porn use will improve.
Can I Masturbate?
While the big goal is to overcome porn addiction, many guys experience a significantly faster recovery if they also cut out masturbation during the pmo reboot.
Then, after they are recovered, some guys choose to introduce masturbation again (but without porn), while others are done with it for good…
…its up to you, but I would recommend that you give it up for at least 90 days. This is just something that has been proven to give the best, and fastest results.
Can I Have Sex While Rebooting From Porn?
Again, there is only one rule: NO PORN!
Real sex is healthy and natural, but some guys find that they fall back into a flatline if they orgasm too much, too soon, after getting their libido back. You just have to try what works best for you, but if you want my advice it would be this; as long as you're not forcing anything (like forcing an erection with some death grip masturbation) go ahead and have sex during your reboot.
You might want to go easy on the orgasms though…
…in fact, I would say, if possible try to go the full 90 days without ejaculating. This is pretty easy if you do slow and gentle intercourse. This is called “Karezza”, basically meaning that the focus is NOT on the orgasm, but on reaching a relaxed state union with your partner.
Karezza is very healthy for your pmo reboot and I personally believe it will significantly speed up your recovery as it really rewires your sexual circuits to the real thing.
Ok, but enough talk already, let's get to the good stuff. You might want to bookmark this page and come back to it several times as there is a wealth of knowledge here.
Let's get to the PMO rebooting tips…
PMO Rebooting Tip # 1
Be Careful With Sugar!
Don't wake a sleeping bear!
So what do I mean?
Well, when you eat something sweet you are activating the reward circuit in your brain, and once your sugary treat is gone, the reward center is wide awake and will start looking for something else that elevates dopamine…
…like for example PMO!
By eating those two donuts you have basically awaken the beast.
The same is true for fast carbohydrates, but real sugary treats, like candy, chocolate cake, donuts etc are particularly bad.
When I did my own pron reboot, a few years ago, 90% of my relapses happened after eating sugar or fast carbohydrates. On the other hand, when I went on a ketogenic diet, I suddenly had so much control over my responses.
Now, the keto diet is pretty extreme and I understand that not everyone wants to go full keto mode, but at least cut out the sugar during your 90 day PMO reboot…
…trust me on this, it will drastically reduce the number of relapses.
Related post: Eating Healthy On NoFap (Why it's So improtant)
Tip # 2
You should have a “reboot notebook”
On your very first day of rebooting I recommend you write down all the reasons why you want to reboot in the first place. Write it down on the first page in your reboot notebook under the headline “My Why”.
You want to read your “why” every single day during your 90 day pmo reboot, because as soon as the urges start messing with you, you tend to forget why rebooting is important to you.
By reading it daily, you are programming it into your subconscious mind and this will make it much easier for you to ignore all the negative thoughts, when they pop up later in your reboot.
- “Why bother…what's the point?”
- This is just self torture, fapping is normal”
- Porn can't be that bad anyway…everyone is using it”
…etc… those thoughts will come. Truest me on this.
They will visit you many times during your reboot. So, again, get yourself a pmo reboot notebook and write down your “why”.
Need help? check out a good online course for quitting porn here
Tip # 3
(This one is VERY IMPORTANT!)
Realize That You Will Probably Relapse – And Get To Know Your Triggers!
Realize that you will probably relapse a few times before being able to go 90 days. I'm not saying this to discourage you, but to make you aware of the fact that most people relapse and that the trick is to learn something from every relapse.
Things to ask yourself after a relapse…
What triggered you?
- Did you see a YouTube video with some hot chick in it?
- Were you trying to escape something? (feelings of loneliness, disappointment, anger etc.)
- Did you have low blood sugar? (remember the sugar thing here)
- Were you sleep deprived?
If you pay attention, you will get to know your triggers. Write them down in your reboot journal and think about them often.
Become aware of them…
Then what you need to do is to start becoming aware of when a trigger hit you in your everyday life. This sounds obvious, but most of the time the beginner rebooter just gets dragged along by a trigger, without noticing it, and not even realizing that he is about to relapse.
So what should you do when you are hit by a trigger?
Well, this leads me to the next tip…
Tip # 4
Write Down A Few Replacement Activities!
Getting to know your triggers is not enough. You also need to have a plan what to do instead of watching porn, when triggered…
…you need to have a few replacement activities written down.
Write down at least 5 different replacement activities
Take out your reboot journal (you did buy one, right? as you can see you will need it often. You really need one) and write down a few activities that you can do the very moment when presented with a strong craving.
The trick is to not make the replacement activities too demanding because that will just make you avoid doing them.
Here are a few examples…
When I get hit by strong cravings I will…
- Turn the computer off and go for a walk. I will walk to a cafe and have a nice cup of coffee. (this is a good example of a healthy activity ending in a small reward)
- Turn the computer off and go visit a friend
- Turn the computer off and go to the library. See if you can use the books to learn something new without using the internet. A small interesting fact, or something like that.
- Turn the computer off and go to the gym, followed by a nice dinner as a reward.
- Turn the computer off and go for a run, take a cold shower and write down tomorrows to-do list.
- Rad a book while you drink a nice cup of tea.
- Make some coffee, and while you are waiting, clean your room.
A lot of people make the mistake of making all the replacement activities too brutal. Like for example; do 200 push ups, go for a 5 mile run and then take a 10 minute cold shower. While the intention is good, it just won't work in the long run…
…Why? Well because the gap between the allure of fapping to porn and the replacement activity becomes too big for your brains reward system to handle, and so you just relapse instead…
…trust me on this, even though we like self improvement, do NOT make the replacement activities too challenging.
Tip # 5
Read Rebooting Success Stories
This one takes almost no effort. It is easy to do and it will help keep you motivated.
At some point during the reboot most people will experience some doubt whether or not the whole reboot process is working. That's one more reason why it is very beneficial reading reboot success stories…
…read about all the benefits they got. How they overcame ED and now have rock hard boners, massive confidence, women attraction etc.
There are thousands and thousands of success stories online and perhaps the best place to find them is on Gary Wilson's site yourbrainonporn.
Tip # 6
If I could only recommend one single reboot tool, it would be meditation. Meditation is THE best tool for learning how to NOT get dragged along by your thoughts and feelings…
…this, in turn, will also make you master the art of not reacting to porn cravings.
When looking back at my own PMO reboot and when thinking about all the hundreds of reboot journals I've read, I can confidently say, guys who meditate during their nofap journey have less relapses in total AND not only that…they also recover faster!
Start with 10 minutes a day and increase the length of your sessions by 5 minutes every day, until you reach 30 minutes.
What's that you say? Boring?
Look: 30 minutes a day to reduce the number of relapses and to recover faster, boring or not, it sounds like a very good deal to me.
Tip # 7
Talk To Someone About Your Addiction!
Okay, I realize that this one is not easy and it's not like you HAVE to do it in order to recover…
…however, if you have a good friend, or someone you can trust, I really recommend you tell someone about your problem and your reboot.
So why is this?
Well, as clichè as it may sound it will lessen the burden and take a weight of your shoulders. This will make you feel better both mentally and physiologically. You will feel like you have someone in your corner as you fight your rounds and that, in turn, will help you get through the bad days…
…and there will be plenty of bad days during your nofap journey.
I personally told my closest friend when I did my reboot, years ago. And now, I even make YouTube videos about it, albeit I am fully recovered today. Look, we shouldn't be ashamed of it, but instead be proud that we are improving our lives.
Tip # 8
Be Prepared For The Dreaded Flatline
If you are addicted to online porn (have developed addiction related brain changes) then you will probably experience the so called “flatline” at some point during your reboot.
What is the flatline?
The flatline is a period of time when the rebooter experience some or all of the following…
- A complete loss of libido (Even if you see a super hot chick you have no physical response in your body. Objectively you can of course see that she is hot, but there is no physical “response” in your body.)
- Lower mood (Many people experience low mood, or even depression, during the flatline, as everything seems grey. This is probably because the dopamine levels, that were already low to begin with, drops even further a few days after quitting)
- No drive and motivation
- Low self-worth
- Loss of sensitivity in the penis (Some people even experience a temporary reduction in size and the penis shrivels up. Rebooters often call this phenomenon “the turtle head”. This is probably because the brain is now sending ZERO sexual signals to the penis)
Now, many porn addicts are already struggling with some or several of those symptoms because of the addiction, but during the flatline they tend to get even worse for a couple of weeks…
…don't worry though…
The Flatline will pass!
The flatline typically starts in the second week and it varies in length from one person to another. It can also come and go a few times during the PMO reboot.
The flatline is understandably a period of distress, but the important thing to remember is that it will always pass.
For more information about the length of the flatline, take a look at this video:
(Consider subscribing to my YouTube channel for more videos like this, by clicking this link)
Tip # 9
Get A Time Lock Safe
Obviously this is not something that you have to do, but it can be a wonderful tool to help you get over “a relapse plateau”.
I personally used one during my own reboot and I still use it today, when I like to do a “dopamine detox” and take a little break from internet.
One smart way of using the time lock safe is to go “operation blackout” and put your smartphone in the safe every night at, for example, 6 pm.
You just set the timer so that the safe will be locked between 6-pm and the time you get up in the morning.
You can also lock up the internet router and eliminate all possibilities to use internet in the evening, which is when most people relapse.
What to do during “operation blackout”
Well, it's a wonderful opportunity to do physical exercise, read books, meditate and become more mindful. All of which may speed up your reboot recovery.
Being mindful a couple of hours before bedtime is very healthy for your brain and as a “bonus” you will also get a deeper and better sleep, as opposed to when you are using internet or your smartphone all the way, leading up to bedtime.
It is kind of like an intermittent dopamine detox and this is the reson why I still go “operation blackout” to this day, even though it's years since I recovered from my PMO addiction.
I call it my “warrior evenings”, and they are just so incredible healthy for the brain.
It's a good investment for life, really. You can click here to read real user reviews on Amazon.
Tip # 10
WARNING: Be Aware Of The Chaser Effect
If you at some point relapse during your reboot, you have to be aware of the chaser effect.
The chaser effect is a term used to describe a short period of intense cravings followed an orgasm. The chaser effect can happen the same day you ejaculated or the following day…
…this means that you should be extra careful for about 36 hours after a relapse.
So now some of you may say, why be extra careful? I already relapsed, so why not binge for a few days…
…well, that is a VERY bad idea, which leads me to the next tip…
Tip # 11
If You Relapse – Get Right Back Up And DO NOT BINGE!!!
Many people get into the typical “addict think” when relapsing….
“Man, I blew it…I might as well binge for a couple of days since my counter is back to zero”
NO!!! Do NOT think like that!!!
Even though YOU are trying to do a 90 day PMO reboot, and even though YOU are counting days, your brain does not count days. It is just doing its healing and one relapse does not have to mean that you “undo” all the healing it has done so far.
If it was a short relapse, and you get right back up, it might not have been that harmful, HOWEVER, if you get into that addict think and you take a relapse as an opportunity to binge, well yeah, then you really set yourself back to zero as far as the brain healing goes…
…so again, if you relapse, do NOT binge and watch out for the chaser effect. Here might be a very good time to use the time lock safe!
Tip # 12
Rewire Rewire Rewire
A good PMO reboot consists of two parts.
- Letting your old porn pathways in the brain get weaker (this is done by quitting, obviously)
- Building new pathways to real life people
Number one is easy to understand, but many people underestimate the second part.
You see, years of porn use have to some degree trained your sexuality to respond to pixels on a screen, this is perhaps the biggest reason behind porn induced ED by the way.
We need to let the old porn pathways die and then build new pathways to real life people. This is what rebooters call “rewiring”.
Now, some people think that you should do part 2 after you have rebooted a few months, but in my opinion you can start rewiring right away.
You might want to keep yourself from ejaculating for a few weeks though (even with a real life partner), this is just because most people seem to recover a bit faster that way. Kissing, hugging and slow gentle sex without orgasming is incredible beneficial for your reboot though, and if you happen to ejaculate, don't worry about it.
On the other hand, if you are anxious and think that you HAVE to start dating right away, then no, you don't. Know that just spending time around real girls, (dancing, smiling or just talking) will also help rewire your brain.
Go for sex when you feel like you want to try it, no need to hurry things if you don't want to.
Tip # 13
You Need Other Goals Too
You can't just have “The 90 day PMO reboot” as your only goal. Just focusing on what NOT to do for 90 days is not only counterproductive, it is alsoo very stressful.
You should have some other, non reboot related goals that you work on simultaneously. Trust me on this, it is very important. If you just keep focusing on NOT watching porn, you will drive yourself crazy.
Take your focus away from the porn by redirecting it to some productive goals, like for example…
- Lose 15 pounds and increase your bench press by 20 pounds
- Start an online business
- Start playing a musical instrument
- Get some nice clothes and improve your social skills
- Create a website or start a YouTube channel
- By 10 books and read all of them
Tip # 14
Keep Your Blood Sugar Stable
This is related to Tip # 1, but it is so important that I need to touch on it a bit more. In Tip #1 you learned that sugar can awaken the beast (your reward system) and thus make you more prone to relapses…
…but there is more going on!
When you eat a lot of fast carbs your blood sugar will spike and after some time, they will come crashing back down. When they come back down they often trigger a cortisol and adrenaline release.
Now, cortisol and adrenaline are powerful stress hormones and did you know that most relapses happen when we are stressed?
Yes, so first you wake the reward system by all the sugar, and then an hour or two later, you have elevated stress hormones in your blood…
…a real double whammy!
What to do about it…
You can keep your blood sugar leves more stable by doing any of the following…
- Go on a ketogenic diet
- Eat only low GI carbs
- Only eat your carbs once a day For example at dinner after you have gone “operation black out”. ‘in other words, you basically eat a low carb diet during the day, and then everything goes in your last meal.
Tip # 15
Do NOT Drift!
What do I mean by drifting?
Well, you drift when you are sitting at your computer without any specific goal of what to do. You know, just aimless browsing, going from one clip to another on YouTube, choosing some random clip that pops up in the suggested video section…
…this is dangerous. It's dangerous because this is exactly how relapses tend to start.
Now, by all means play computer games, watch movies and YouTube clips, but know what you are going to watch or play in advance and then DO THAT and don't drift.
The biggest danger is late at night, when we are tired after all the day's work and all the willpower for the day is gone, and we sit down at the computer and start drifting. Well, it won't take long until you are hit with a trigger…
…oh look at that fitness model, shes got a nice ass indeed, let's see if she has some more booty videos…
…before you know it you go from those booty videos to “the real deal” and start to watch all kinds of hardcore stuff.
So again, do what you want to do, but PLAN IT AHEAD and then do that… and only that.
Tip # 16
If You Relapse – Don't Beat Yourself Up Over it
It may sound counterintuitive, but you have to be kind to yourself after a relapse.
Now, I'm not writing this because it sounds good, but there are actually studies done, showing that addicts who feel strong negative emotions towards themselves, after a relapse, keep relapsing more easily in the future…
…on the other hand, addicts who are forgiving towards themselves learn much quicker how to master the art of overcoming an addiction.
So, if you relapse, don't be so hard on yourself. Just learn from your mistake, write it down in your reboot notebook and analyse what happened, and then…
…try to do a better job next time urges arise.
Tip # 17
Keep Yourself Busy
Sure you can play your video games and watch your movies, but try to make an effort to stay active during the 90 day PMO reboot.
Do new stuff, learn new stuff…
…it will help you avoid relapses while it also makes you grow as a person.
Think about the line in Shawshank Redemption; “Get busy living, or get busy dying!
Tip # 18
Turn On Safe Search
Most browsers or search engines have an option called “Turn on safe search”.
Find that option and tick the box. While it is very easy to get around, at least it will eliminate 98% of all random triggers that otherwise can be thrown in your face.
Turn it on on day 1 of your 90 day PMO reboot and make a promise to yourself to not turn it off until you successfully gone the full 90 days. Maybe you'll leve it on for life.
Tip # 19
Buy Gary Wilson Book “Your Brain On Porn”
I have said it before, and I'll say it again. Every person on the planet who are doing a 90 day porn reboot must read this book. It is like the bible of pmo addiction and we need to learn as much as we can about what happens inside the brain when using porn…
..the book is really that important…
Click image to check pricing over at Amazon
…in fact, the book is so important that I'll go as far as to say “every single man on the planet” needs this book (even if they are not a porn addict) so that they can educate themselves about the risks of using online porn.
Why? well our kids…we need to warn our kids. Every father needs to educate himself about this so that he can explain to his kids why we have to be careful with supernormal stimuli, like porn. It's bad enough that our generation grew up with it, and got messed up, we should not let that happen to the next generation.
Tip # 20
Take Cold Showers!
Some people love them, most people hate them though. Personally I have a love/hate relationship with them.
Why cold showers?
There are many reasons why cold showers can help your 90 day pmo reboot.
- They are one of the best tools to massively increase your willpower (and what do you think more willpower can do to avoid relapses? That's right, a heck of a lot)
- They increase the number of dopamine D2 receptors in your brain (this is good because porn addiction destroys d2 receptors. So cold showers can actually help speed up your recovery in a real biological sense)
- They learn you the art of being comfortable being uncomfortable (think about that line for a minute. After some thought I'm sure you will start to realize how valuable that can be…for everything in life, not just rebooting)
How to do cold showers…
You could just put the water on the coldest setting and then jump right in. That is brutal though, I do admit that.
What I personally like to do is to take my normal shower first, with normal hot water, and then when I'm done washing myself I just turn the knob all the way to the coldest setting…standing there, shouting like a caveman, and after 3 minutes I get out…
…feeling like a badass and ready to conquer the world!
Tip # 21
Help Someone Else
Teaching is the fastest way to learn something yourself.
That's right, by helping someone else who are struggling with PMO addiction, you are actually helping yourself to learn even more and to grow faster. Not only that, but as a bonus you are actually doing something for the greater good…
…could there be a better bonus?
90 DAY PMO Rebot Final Words
Ok, there you have it. Now, do yourself a favor and bookmark this page and come back to it again and again during your 90 day reboot.
By doing so, it will help you stay motivated and help you stay on track.
Doing a full 90 day reboot is not easy, but I'm 100% sure you can do it if your really set your mind to it.
So raise up and go after it, warrior!
P.S. Are you struggling? Click here to go to my contact page to discover what kind of help I’m currently offering.